But Wait...There's More

The results are back. The tumors he already has have grown, there are also two new tumors that have developed since the last scan. They're all still in the same area of the body, so at least that part is good...no spreading to other organs. He will not be doing HIPEC.
They also found multiple blood clots in his lungs. We'll need to start giving him the same injections we did after his surgery. (I say 'we' - but, that really means that I get to do that.)
I had a feeling that HIPEC might not be the way that things would go - so, I'm not surprised about that part. As we talked about it - we both still felt like things will work out the way they are supposed to in the end. It's hard not to know the next step. It's obvious the second type of chemo wasn't working...so, we'll have to go from here. Layne did mention some sort of group that is doing some testing right now. I don't know exactly what that is or if it's an option.
A year later, it still feels like we keep going back to the drawing board. Although, we now know two types of chemo that won't work and that HIPEC is not an option. We just have to have the faith to take that step into the dark.

Whatever Will Be, Will Be

I just dropped Layne off at the airport. He's heading to Houston to do the assessment routine again. This will be the time they'll tell him rather he's able to do HIPEC or not. In a way, I'm a little nervous - in another way, I feel like it'll be whatever it's going to be and we'll go from there. I guess it could be compared to being pregnant, getting an ultrasound, and finding out the gender of the baby. The facts are already there - you're just going to find out what they are. So, whatever will be will be. I remembered that while we were talking this morning. Before that, I was more nervous. Now I feel like things really will turn out however they need to...at least we'll have a better idea about what the next step will be.
IF he does end up doing HIPEC, it's currently scheduled for mid June (just in time for my birthday).

Results from Houston visit

The trip to Houston was good.  I enjoyed meeting some new friends, loved the Texas BBQ, and the weather sure beats Salt Lake City in December.

The oncologists at MD Anderson told me they are not sure yet whether I am a candidate for HIPEC.  They had two concerns that would need to be addressed before I could receive the treatment.  One is that they don't think my current chemotherapy is working, and HIPEC would not be effective without a chemo treatment that stops the cancer.  The other concern was that I may have cancer near my bladder in a place where they could not surgically remove it, again making the HIPEC ineffective.  I think Teresa mentioned these things in her recent posts.

Anyway, I will meet with my oncologist here in Salt Lake on Tuesday and do a session of chemo on Wednesday.  I think the plan is try another kind of chemo, and then follow up with scans again in a few months to see how things are working. 

Layne

The Saga Continues

It would be really great if we could just be done with cancer and move on with our lives...but, even as I type that - I know that being done with the cancer ultimately means that Layne is gone. I don't want that either. I'm so grateful for the time we've been able to spend together the last few months.
Having said that, I got a call from Layne this morning that I just can't get out of my head. Facts we were fairly certain of were confirmed. The chemo he's been doing is not working. There are new growths since all visible growths were removed during his surgery.
The scan that was done this week, shows a mass located in a spot where surgical removal would be tricky...too many blood vessels surrounding the tumor. They informed us that the next step would be to go in and check the site to answer a couple of questions. Is there an actual tumor there? And, could it be removed successfully? If the answer is no to the second question, there will be no HIPEC for Layne.
The other factor is finding a chemo that works for him. His oncologist was going to change his treatment starting the next round anyway. So, we'll see what happens there. They suggested to schedule the procedure (to check on the random tumor) for this coming Tuesday. He thought to stay in Houston and get the procedure done so we would know one of the pieces to the puzzle. The chemo would need to wait for at least three weeks in order for him to be able to heal and then handle the new chemo. That would mean almost two months between chemo treatments.
While we were discussing options, it came to my mind that time was a factor. (My chin started to quiver.) We need to do what will give us answers in the least amount of time. So, we're going to go with him returning to keep the chemo appointment he has early in the upcoming week. That way, we can work on whether the chemo works or not. The chemo treatments need to be finished before he does HIPEC anyway (if at all). That way, if we find the chemo is working, he'll go back the MD Anderson and have the procedure done. We'll be able to get going on the chemo instead of waiting for the healing time of the procedure.
As I was talking with Layne, I really felt the impact of the time factor. Not only did I know we needed to have the timing be one of the factors to consider while deciding what to do, I also was very aware of the idea that we might be separated sooner than we've been thinking. We keep thinking Layne has some time left...although, we don't know how much. But, today I had the real feeling that our time is shorter than we think.

HIPEC Assessment

This was written previously. It's the post I referred to on the November 20th post. I was going to share more background information...but, Layne's post gives explanation and this is just more of my reaction to it.
Layne found out today that he is scheduled for a HIPEC assessment the first week of December. You might be asking, 'What is HIPEC and why is it being considered?'. It was something that was discussed when treatment was first being determined. It was decided against because it is invasive and it's not nationally approved. They only do the tried and true approved treatment at Huntsman. The results of the last scan that was done means that Layne may or may not have some new masses growing. It was suggested that HIPEC be looked into again. The doctor knows someone in Houston that does it. All I know is that it scares me. I'm not sure it guarantees much, it's hard on the body, is expensive (not sure insurance will cover it) and takes awhile to recover. I grieved all over again today about him dying and what that means for me, our family and the future. The girls have asked me several times tonight if I'm alright. The boys/Layne are gone scuba diving. (Layne's going as an 'adult on the surface'.)
There are times I try not to think about what is going to eventually happen and it's been awhile since it hit me hard. Tonight was just one of those times.
Layne doesn't seem to be a bit concerned. He thinks it's available...so why not try it? It seems to be the scientist in him.

Houston

So on October 25th my oncologist had me do another CT scan to see how things were progressing with my chemotherapy.  He said they found two potential tumors in my abdomen, that may or may not have been there since the the last scan in July.  The tumor board met regarding my case again, and although they don't agree with the procedure, decided it would be wise to refer me to a center where they do HIPEC (Hyperthermic Intraperitoneal Chemotherapy).  You can look for information about it online, but basically they open your abdomen, root around for tumors to remove, and then slosh hot chemotherapy drugs around inside the abdomen to kill anything they can't remove.  It is very invasive and they are highly selective about the patients on which they perform the procedure.  But they also have very good outcomes for the patients that receive HIPEC.

I will be traveling to Houston on Monday to visit MD Anderson Cancer Center to see if I am a candidate for this procedure.  I did not receive any chemotherapy yesterday in preparation for this visit, and the rest of my chemotherapy treatments depend on what they decide.  If they say I am a candidate for HIPEC, then I will be doing whatever they say to prepare and my current chemotherapy may end.  If I am not a candidate, then my oncologist said he probably will change my treatments slightly from FOLFOX to FOLFIRI and Avastin.

Hopefully the doctors at MD Anderson will have an answer for me by the end of my visit next week.  Teresa and I will let you know when we find out.

Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers.

Layne