Benefits of a Savior

Something I jotted down on my Christ Daily Facebook page tonight:
So today I had some thoughts about loved ones dying and how my husband is longer here. I was thinking about how some people get married again after a spouse dies. They are lonely and want the companionship again. I get that. At this point I don't feel like it's right for me. I realized that the reasons I think and feel what I do about the topic is because of Christ. I know I will see my husband again. I know he didn't just suddenly cease to exist. I know that is true and will happen because I know our Savior's role in the plan of salvation. I know He lives. As a result, I know my husband continues to live as well. We will see each other again. I like that thought.

I thought I'd share it here as well. I'm so thankful to know I'll see Layne again. There are times the thought of getting married again have passed through my mind. The thought never stays for very long. I feel like I know he's still around and we're still married. I'm still at a point where it would feel like I was betraying him. I'm not saying that all widows would or even should feel that way - I'm just saying that's how I feel about the topic. There's something about knowing that Layne would know that feels a little bit creepy to me. I'm also at a point where I might feel lonely at times - but right now I don't want anyone to take Layne's place. I know that's not exactly how it works. I just know that's what it would feel like to me right now. I may or may not feel the same way five years from now. I don't know.

So Much...

I have many topics running around in my head. Some are about cancer and Layne, some are about our kids and homeschooling, some are about what we are grateful for these days, some are about the purpose of the Christmas season, some are about the latest family happenings, and some are just about logistics for tomorrow. I'm sure I could go on...but, that would be a bit boring.
We've been truly blessed. We are so grateful for all who keep us in their thoughts and prayers. We are humbled by those who serve us. This has been a different holiday season for us. I'm behind on plans. We haven't participated in all of the events that we were originally thinking to this year. But, at the same time, there is a peace in our home that comes from attempting to be close to the Savior. Or maybe it's just that He's trying to tell us something. I think that something would be that somehow, it will be OK...and that's all we need to know. We would drive ourselves crazy trying to figure out how things will work out. So, we don't. Time will tell. In the meantime, we are enjoying this precious season. There is so much to be grateful for each day.
So...Merry Christmas to all...and to all a good night.