His Blog
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
Remember
It's been three weeks since I watched Layne take his last breath. Yesterday marked two weeks since his funeral. I had a chance to visit his spot in the cemetery for the first time. I cried. It looked lonely. I felt lonely. I had a sentence come to mind. "This is not where I am." I'm not sure if he felt like that would make it all better. At that moment, I felt like a hug would have made it all better. I just wanted him to hold me - but, I knew he couldn't. I think it was his way of reminding me that he's closer than his casket. I felt it was also his way of sharing his testimony again. He wanted me to remember that he is much more than a body that is still filled with cancer. I think what he would want me to remember most of all is that he believes we are an eternal family and he will still be doing his part to make that happen for us. I love him. I miss him. Every. Day.
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Teresa, "Remember" was on my mind yesterday too. Watch your snailmail...I sent something to you yesterday about remembering. I am so grateful that it seems Layne is staying close by and is continuing to communicate with you. I know you miss him. I wish there were some way I could help to make it all better, but of course, there's not. Just know our prayers for you are unceasing. BIG HUGS! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you can't get a hug from Layne. I am sorry for the many times you feel like you have to do this all alone. But I am so grateful you can occasionally feel the reality that Layne is still loving you and involved in supporting your family.
ReplyDeleteI really have to stop reading your blog at work. The things you write about are so deeply personal and tender. I can't imagine how lonely things have to be for you at times. I'm so grateful that you continue to be willing to share this journey with us!
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